Black Swan = epic thinspo

I’m going to use this post just to emphasize how amazing Black Swan is!
I just finished watching it and I’m totally watching it again. Natalie Portman was amazing! I don’t think I can put into words how great this movie is, it’s a must see (20x minimum!).

Beautiful & Elegant

And tiny…

Where d' you go?

What the fuck is Rozy doing here again?

Yeah, I know, right?...

Well, to be honest it might have had something to do with going through a slight busy period but it had a lot to do with the fact I lost Ash Cloud!

Have any of you heard anything about her? How she's doing?

I have this awkward feeling I might have had something to do with her disappearing. I gave her some advice that wasn't very pro-ana, very 'go for happiness/recovery'-oriented, so I don't know if that kind of pissed/scared her off...

Ugh, I just hope she's okay...her last post was pretty desperate.

In any case, I think I'm back (?)

I've been doing great, I'm really happy and I've been losing weight super slowly, don't know how much I've lost but I can tell by my clothes that I look better.

I'm in again, I just want to keep track of the disappearance of these last ugly pounds!

2 days left!

I think I’m gonna barf… and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

I haven’t binged or broken my fast in any way – so yay for me! I’ve got two days left and I’m gonna make it. The only thing that went ‘differently’ today is that I drank a FUCKLOAD of diet soda, which is basically the reason I think I’m about to barf... Seriously, 3 litres! But it’s low calorie (30cals in total for that little indulgence). I don’t think that counts as breaking a fast really..

Oh and I have to say that it’s thanks to these tips by Almost Skinny Vegan, that I’ve survived so far! I swear, if it wasn’t for the frozen apple juice I’ve been licking, I’d be bingeing on something. It may sound crazy, but that little bit of sugar really helps! I want to try finding some forms so I can make them into proper popsicles!

Don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’ve added some tabs:

Why is Rozy fat? – is basically an ‘about me’

The (current) Skinny Plan – is the diet I’m on currently

I’ve also changed the side bar a bit – I’ve added rewards and I’ve switched weekly goals to STATS.

Don’t have much else to say really… I’m gonna go work on a exercise plan now. I’ll post it, alongside my diet plan, as soon as I’ve finished the fast.

I’m kind of frustrated about the fast though, because this is the first time I’ve fasted and not gotten a flat stomach. Of course, I’ve never been this fat, but still. It’s only common sense that’s keeping me strong – I HAVE to lose weight. It’s not possible that I’ll be the same weight if I keep this up. But I wouldn’t be able to tell that from looking in the mirror… fucking mirror…

I’ve also been doing the opposite of what is typically Ana! Instead of buying clothes that are too small, I’ve been buying clothes that are too big! xD Not because I’m trying to grow into them (fuck that shit – HELL NO!). It’s just because:

• Bigger clothes make you look thinner (if done well).
• I have a closet full of small clothes which I don’t fit already!
• I don’t really have clothes that look good on me now and if I look bad I’m depressed and if I’m depressed I binge.

I’m trying to keep myself happy, it seems to be the best weight loss motivation for me.

 

Much love to you girls!

xxx

Rozy

P.S. This means 2 more days before I force myself onto the scale again!!! I don’t wanna… do I have to?… Is there actually an official phobia of scales? … just googled it, not that I can find… but there should be!!!

Yes, it IS me.

Just thought I'd do a quick post to update you about my 'name change'

I switched my display name from SkinnyRose to Rozy. I sign off with Rozy anyway and I feel as though I should keep the 'Skinny'-title, for when I actually AM skinny.. I mean it's like preemptively calling yourself Mrs...
So if 'Rozy' comments... IT'S ME! :D

xxx

Thinspo | Sad

As you can see from my title, there is an obvious line between thinspo and sad. And ‘The Machinist’, my friends, has crossed the line into sad by far!

And I don’t mean this in a negative way, absolutely not – I really enjoyed that movie. But damn, it was sad, made me tear up. Yeah, okay Christian Bale was skinny, but it didn’t make me think: “Whoa, I want to be skinny!” it didn’t inspire me to starve. If anything, it made me think ‘This must be what it feels like to see someone you care about whither away’…

And let’s not forget it’s SUCH A WASTE of a hot actor!!!

I think this kind of reminded me not to go overboard (not that I need to worry my fat ass about that now). So before I go one, cuties, I got to say: stay safe and don’t overdo it!

Much love <3

Now onto the regular stuff…

As I was re-reading my last post, I noticed it was a week since I’ve posted… A WEEK! And what have I done? Jack shit! Yes, you heard me! Jack shit! Not Fred shit, Johnny shit or Abraham shit – Jack shit! (I know, I’m not funny… laugh anyway).

I really couldn’t bear it to post until I’d had one good day though. And today would be that day (fingers crossed, don’t want to jinx it). The last couple days I’ve been doing well until the evening, but then I’d always find some excuse to binge. NOT TODAY!

I only had tea and water today (and a sip of diet coke), so I’ve done fabulously, if I do say so myself.

Almost Skinny Vegan’s Fasting tips have been great, so I’d advise anyone who’s been on/off to check them out, they really helped me out.

I’ve made a few changes. I’m gonna wear ‘x’ number of bracelets, ‘x’ being the number of days I’m fasting. I’m allowed to take off one bracelet on the morning AFTER the fast. But I’m changing it to a 6 day fast, which coincides with the 71-goal. I should reach it. If I’m 75 right now (assuming the worst), I should will lose 4kg by Friday. And I’m making a schedule every evening or morning, because when I have free time, I obviously can’t handle it and start to eat!

And I’ve decided to measure! Just not the things you regularly measure. I’ve decided to measure my calves! It’s one of those things you never really think of (unless you’re crazy fat like me). But now that it’s getting to be boot-season and all, it’s really nasty when your boots feel tight around your calves. I measured mine and.. ugh…

41cm (FUCKIN SHIT!!! That’s 5 cm smaller than my thighs were at their lowest point. It’s bigger than some catwalk models thighs are now!!! I just tightened the measuring tape and I figure that 35cm should be a good aim.)

I’m also adding a list of rewards to the sidebar…

Responses to your lovely comments:

HarleyHeartsAna: Thanks, even though I’ve been on a binge, I’ve been angry enough to work out. So I guess that evens the score :P

Viulu: Actually, it makes me a bit happier to know he’s holding juice and not milk. Even before I was vegan, milk made me gag…

Shout out to my soul mate, Ash! I’m back

Alice D & Bonesarepure: I say: “Feel the Anger! Feel the Burn!” I’m sure fat isn’t anger-resistant :D

Liz: I hadn’t seen angry thinspo either, but Ash kind of provided in that post of hers! I don’t know if you’ve heard of prettythin.com, but they had a section with bitchspo, which was kind of angry…

Gaia Andre: Thanks, hun. You’ll like it even more now that I’m posting again, I hope xD

Almost.Skinny: I’m over it now and thanks again for the tips! xx

Now, I’m gonna go catch up with your blogs and comment like a good girl should ^^

xxx

Rozy

I’m fuckin’ pissed… and that’s a good thing.

Yesterday my dilemma was, should I go out to eat with my dad, but today he solved that for me by being a complete asshole. I’m not gonna bitch about what happened, cause that’s not really important, but he ticked me off and now I don’t see why I should go out with them. We’re not even that close, it’s more my mom who would feel sad if I didn’t go, but she’ll live.
So – problem solved!
AND as you may already know, there’s no motivation like angry motivation. When I’m pissed, I’m never hungry and I exercise more – it’s a very constructive way to vent.

I was looking for some angry thinspo (wtf?), but I couldn’t find it, so here’s this…

and here’s some more, because personally I don’t think that pics all that great.
(Nothing says angry like metal right?)
(Or scene… ps. is that milk he’s holding? wtf?)

And I just want to thank you all again for your support yesterday, your comments really mean a lot to me!
Thank you for all your suggestions, if I DO end up going (which I can't imagine), I will try and take the healthies option possible (there are always salads, right?). I'm gonna make sure I'm following all of your blogs too, it's only natural to care about those who care about you ^^

Love,
Rozy

JUST SAY NO!

Tomorrow is my dad's birthday, which means we're going out for food... I DONT'FUCKING WANT FOOD!!!

I'm just gonna make up some excuse about not going "I'm busy" "I'm feeling ill" whatever, cause if I go, I'm gonna eat and I'm NOT going to be happy.

Didn't take the pics yet, sorry, will do it soon and I'll also weigh myself monday,  yeah, I know, putting it off, but I just want to see a DECREASE!! on that fucking thing...

Okay, this may not have been the most usefl post ever, but I just wanted to update you and I also wanted to put it out there that I'm NOT EATING OUT TOMORROW! If I write it here, I'll have to stick to it...

I'm feeling shite today....

So here's a pic to pick me up (ugh, even word-jokes aren't doin' it for me today...)